Acceptance….through Awareness by Dr. Rajan SankaranJanuary 15, 2022
I heard that in an interview Mother Teresa was asked if she was to give her whole philosophy in one word “what would it be?” She said, “ACCEPTANCE”.
More often than not, our stress comes from a non-acceptance of the situation or people. We ask why does a particular situation has to be the way it is or why cannot a particular person be like this or like that? For example, why is my son going in the wrong direction or why is my partner cheating me? Do we feel why are there corrupt politicians around? Why is the situation of the country so bad? This in turn causes anger, grief, disappointment, and anxiety.
The underlying perspective behind this is NON-ACCEPTANCE. Sometimes we await the time when the situation or a person will change according to our desires. We feel that when that happens we will feel stress-free. For example, “when my boss appreciates me or the day when I get a raise in my job that day I will be stress-free.”
But the deeper and more important question here is, why is non-acceptance there?”
Take for instance that you cannot accept that your boss is rude. The question is why not? Is it your sensitivity because of which you are not able to accept it or is your ego that is the problem or is it your fear that is the problem? Asking this question to ourselves shows where this non-acceptance is coming from. Once you know that, you are more aware of the pattern within you.
On the contrary, when we accept the situation as it is, things become much easier. If the boss is rude, this is how he is. This is the way politicians are. If we accept things in this manner it can help to reduce our stress.
But acceptance doesn’t mean inaction. It means that when you come from a position of acceptance then you can see whether something can change or something cannot change. Acceptance gives you the space from where you can respond cleverly and not react impulsively.
For example, if there is an obese boy who is constantly eating. His mother may feel, why is my son like this, why does he eat so much? Now in this case, rather than just being disappointed about her son’s habits and blaming him for that, if she accepts the situation in the first place, it can open the window of solution for her. She can look for the cause and address it in a way that is not counter-productive.
The question is where does acceptance come from?
Why should you accept?
More about this..coming up soon…